After reading an article about shyness recently, I came to an astounding revelation: I’m an introvert! I know that some people would doubt this claim, but allow me to prove my point…

1. I frequently have to force myself to answer the phone even if the person calling is someone I like talking to. Once answered, I will have to: a) stop what I’m doing, b) pay attention, c) say something relevant, d) eventually end the conversation in a natural way, not just with “Well…bye…” I also don’t like making phone calls. I’ve needed to call my dermatologist’s office for over a week now to ask about a prescription for something other than the $700 cream he prescribed that my insurance won’t cover. Apparently, I’d rather have acne than talk to a receptionist for three minutes.

2. I get nervous talking to 98% of people I encounter daily. I start sweating profusely and talk too much. I say fifty words when two would be sufficient. When I went in for my annual GYN exam Monday I found myself asking my doctor questions just to fill the silence. (I don’t really want to know how an IUD works) And take it from me, when your doctor asks: “Is intercourse painful?” she doesn’t want anecdotal data to support your claim that everything’s working like clock-work in that area. She’s willing to take your word for it.

3. I’m exhausted by big groups. I prefer to spend most of my time alone or with a small group of people. When I came home from volunteering at school today I did a Mr. Rogers. I took off my jacket and shoes and put on a cardigan and slippers. I reveled in the solitude of my house. I was thrilled with the opportunity to iron Brent’s shirts and mend Knox’s jeans. I am officially the Most Boring Person in Murfreesboro.

One of the bright spots to the article was that many people are “ambiverts”–they can switch between introvert and extrovert. I guess that’s me. I can use which ever “vert” best suits the circumstance. Which led me to wonder if I was “ambi” in other ways. I know I’m not ambidextrous. Maybe I’m ambi-dessertous: I can both create and eat desserts with equal expertise. I’m not ambi-cleanbedous: I will faithfully wash all the bed sheets in the house every Saturday but just don’t look under the bed.

I guess it just goes to show you that you can’t put anyone in a box. Our intricately crafted personalities defy simplified labels and I like this about us. In an un-introverted way, I enjoy that surprise!